Keeper of the Gate by Susan Seden Boulet

Keeper of the Gate by Susan Seddon-Boulet

After waking up sick in the night and dreaming many times of throwing up, much to our surprise, on August 2 my husband, best friend and love of my life Erol and I found out that we were pregnant.

A couple of weeks prior, we were at my dear friend Anna’s wedding in the Pacific Northwest where Erol found a magical owl feather and gave it to me, knowing how much I’ve always connected with owl medicine. Once home I placed it on my sacred alter with my other special crystals, feathers, talismans, and artwork.

Just three days after returning home, Erol’s sister and my close friend, Suzan, went into pre-term labor. Since we had not yet had a chance to do her blessing way, on the way to the hospital I grabbed the owl feather as it represents wisdom, as well as my protector crystal. All night throughout her labor, the little owl feather sat above her head in the hospital, bringing her strength and wisdom.

Suzan’s birth completely opened my heart and while I was delivering Niko Flynn, counting her contractions and telling her when to push, all I could think about was how beautiful and powerful this all was and how much I wanted a baby! Overcome with emotion, I even told her the following morning that I didn’t think I could wait til the following summer, when Erol and I had planned to get married and then conceive in Turkey. Well guess what? I was already pregnant and didn’t know it.

So when I found out I was pregnant about two weeks later, on August 2, I was utterly shocked and overcome with joy. I wanted to hold onto that little apple seed inside of me so badly that I was anxious. I knew so many women that miscarried with their first, I didn’t want to get too excited. So in my nervous state, I decided to pick a medicine card. I have a book of cards given to me by my mom that for years has served as my spiritual guide. I meditated on my baby and picked Owl.

Owl medicine is symbolically associated with clairvoyance, astral projection, and magic…An Owl feather is silent. You cannot hear Owl when it flies…Owl is a symbol for wisdom. This is because owl can see that which others cannot, which is the essence of true wisdom. Where others are deceived, Owl sees and knows what is there. Athena, the Greek goddess of wisdom, had a companion Owl on her shoulder which revealed unseen truths to her. Owl had the ability to light up Athena’s blind side, enabling her to speak the whole truth, as opposed to only a half truth…Owl can bring you messages in the night through dreams or meditations. Pay attention to the signals and omens. The truth always brings further enlightenment.

This was the first time I had ever picked owl. I was pretty blown away that Erol had given me the owl feather shortly after conception, then I took that owl medicine with me to accompany little Niko Flynn safely into this world – a night which made me realize how much I wanted a baby of my own – and then shortly after I found out I was pregnant and when meditating on my situation drew the Owl medicine card. I call that synchronicity!

A week later we went up to my dad and Nantzy’s property up in Hopland and found a gorgeous feather out on the counter. I asked Nantzy about it and she said for some reason she felt compelled to pick it up, which was strange for her because she saw many feathers all the time and never picked them up, asking me if I wanted it. I accepted, and we looked it up in the bird book and it was, not surprisingly, another owl feather that found its way to me!

These owl tales are the reason I started referring to my little baby as “owlette” (though actually my dear sister Heather Hendrie coined that nickname!). With all this owl medicine being drawn to my womb, Erol and I were sure we had a little boy in there. But it wasn’t until our next animal medicine appearance that we knew we were having a boy.

Wolf Spirit by Susan Seddon-Boulet

Wolf Spirit by Susan Seddon-Boulet

After my first and second to last ultrasound (I don’t trust those machines – my baby put his hands up to his head and started flailing his legs vigorously, turning away from the machine) at 10 weeks, we came home feeling excited after seeing our little baby, it finally feeling real. With a new photo of our little peanut, we decided to pick another medicine card. I closed me eyes and felt the energy of little owlette’s picture. It was very clearly a soft green light, and very warm to my hand. After identifying owlette’s energy, I passed my had over the 52 animal medicine cards, one by one, eyes closed, until I found the card with the same soft green light and warmth as owlette. I immediately drew it. Wolf!

The significance of wolf is so huge, I simply can’t explain in words. But the long story very short is that many years after my brother Jesse Robin passed away, during a life changing semester studying Environmental Politics in the American West, he visited me in Chaco Canyon, New Mexico, in the spirit of a wolf. I was supposed to go with the rest of the group of 25 to explore some ruins and instead felt compelled to take some personal time and go running in the magical mountains. Midway through my run, I glanced over to my right and saw a beautiful, majestic wolf sitting just 10 feet from the trail. When my eyes pierced into his, a chill ran through my entire body as thunder and lightning crashed in the sky. I am not even enhancing this story – it was incredible and happened exactly in that order. In the fleeting second of our eyes meeting, and the skies crashing, every single cell in my body knew that Jesse was visiting me, it was an overwhelming feeling, and I didn’t stop but kept running, letting the warm tears pour down my face.

It was about a year after that occurrence that I watched my brother’s memorial service and heard one of his best friends saying that during Jesse’s final years of life (ages 18-20), he had asked all his friends to call him “Jesse Lupis.” Canis Lupis is the latin name for gray wolf. I confirmed this story with Jesse’s friend and felt blessed to have finally understood the deeper significance of the wolf visit in New Mexico.

So when I drew the wolf medicine card while searching out the medicine of my baby, I felt pretty sure that not only was I having a little baby boy carrying the spirit of my brother, but that also I was carrying some potent wolf medicine.

Wolf is the pathfinder, the forerunner of new ideas who returns to the clan to teach and share medicine…The senses of Wolf are very keen, and the Moon is its power ally. The Moon is the symbol for psychic energy, or the unconscious that holds the secrets of knowledge and wisdom. Baying at the Moon may be an indication of Wolf’s desire to connect with new ideas which are just below the surface of consciousness. Wolf medicine empowers the teacher within us all to come forth and aid the children of Earth in understanding the Great Mystery and life…As you feel Wolf coming alive within you, you may wish to share your knowledge by writing or lecturing on information that will help others better understand their uniqueness or path in life. It is in the sharing of great truths that the consciousness of humanity will attain new heights. Wolf could also be telling you to seek out lonely places that will allow you to see your teacher within.

It’s really quite amazing and special that this all came to pass. Again – synchronicity at its finest. I feel so very blessed to be receiving these messages from the Great Divine. It confirms all my beliefs that there is so much more going on in this universe than meets the eye, and I am grateful for these lessons.

It's a Boy!

It’s a Boy!

A couple of months before we got pregnant, our dear roommate Ruth moved out and gave us a going away present – a beautiful blue tile with two swirls mirroring each other and a round circle in the middle. Clearly a symbol of fertility. She said she was very excited for us to have a baby and the tile represented that potential. Then, just 2 days after we found out we were pregnant on August 2, she wrote us that she had a dream we were pregnant! It’s little events like this that, again, convince me that there is so much incredible energy beyond our control in this universe.

So – to wrap up a very long post, I’ll say that today Erol and I had our 20 week ultrasound and found out we’re indeed having a baby boy! 😉 Our due date is March 27, 2013 – the same date that Erol proposed to me in Brazil earlier this year! Magic? Yes.